Category Archives: Articles

Somatic Complaints During the Perinatal Period

Pregnancy and the postpartum period are very vulnerable times. Our bodies change in ways that can feel scary and uncomfortable. It’s also a time when a lot of birthing people experience somatic complaints. Symptoms often include morning sickness and the typical aches and pains of pregnancy and new parenthood. But they can also include sciatica, vertigo, migraine, heartburn, wrist pain, back and neck pain, and even Hyperemesis Gravidarum (severe nausea and vomiting during pregnancy). These symptoms can be scary, and they can make us believe that there is something seriously wrong with our bodies.

When we are experiencing symptoms that scare us, that fear turns up the dial on our perception of those sensations. And those of us who tend to experience these symptoms the most during pregnancy and the postpartum period are folks who “somatize” our stress and emotions — often those of us who’ve experienced childhood adversity and who are also susceptible to depression and anxiety.

I am one of those people. I’ve struggled with chronic symptoms since childhood, including asthma, IBS, TMJ pain, wrist pain, bladder symptoms, etc. But after the birth of my second child, my physical symptoms were the worst I had ever faced. My postpartum anxiety presented as somatic symptoms—constant, overwhelming dizziness and nausea that made it difficult caused me to be unable to care for my children. At the time, I didn’t connect these symptoms to stress or self-neglect, but in hindsight, they were clear signs that I needed better boundaries and self-care. With therapy and support, I learned to prioritize my own well-being, and slowly recovered.

I now know how common it is for new and expecting parents to experience both psychological and physical symptoms during the perinatal period. It’s an incredibly vulnerable time, and stress commonly shows up in the body. The good news is that these symptoms—whether depression, anxiety, vertigo, or pain conditions like headaches, dizziness, wrist tendinitis, neck pain or sciatica—are highly treatable.

As a therapist specializing in perinatal mental health and neuroplastic symptom recovery, I help clients heal both physically and emotionally, so they can return to the full, balanced life they deserve. How we engage with our physical symptoms can either exacerbate or heal them. Pain Reprocessing Therapy teaches us how to view physical sensations from a lens of safety, so sensations are not amplified. And Emotional Awareness and Expression Therapy helps us release strong emotions that can contribute to tension and symptoms in the body.

Psychotherapy can also support birthing people in learning to prioritize our own well-being as we are learning to care for our babies. Not abandoning ourselves while caring for our family helps us become healthy parents in body, mind, and spirit.

Take this Quiz to help you determine if your chronic symptoms are likely neuroplastic.

The Mind/Body Connection in Chronic Pain and Other Symptoms

neck pain

Pain and other chronic symptoms—like IBS, vertigo, tinnitus or bladder issues—can take over our lives. Physical symptoms naturally create fear, and symptoms and fear together can become the center of our attention, pushing everything else into the background.

When pain or symptom keep us from doing the things we enjoy, it’s common to feel anxious or depressed. In fact, most people who struggle with chronic pain also experience anxiety or depression. It’s not always clear which came first, because they are closely connected. Many people with chronic symptoms have experienced childhood adversity, and are likely to be perfectionists or people-pleasers—traits that can increase stress and make us more vulnerable to both physical and emotional symptoms.

While chronic pain and other physical symptoms appear to be based in the body, research shows that trauma, emotions and stress play a powerful role—even sometimes when pain seems to have a clear physical cause.

I experienced this firsthand. Years ago, I developed chronic wrist tendinitis that was attributed to  typing too much. My pain was real and constant, and I tried everything—chiropractic, physical therapy, massage, acupuncture, Alexander Technique, and Feldenkrais classes. Nothing helped for long. I had to stop doing many things I loved. I wore wrist splints, used voice-recognition software, and avoided cooking, gardening, and knitting. Despite all these precautions, I was in pain for more than two years.

Then I found Dr. John Sarno’s book Healing Back Pain. He discovered that many people who had  physical findings that might cause pain—like herniated discs or arthritis—had completely different pain experiences. Some had severe pain, while others with the same imaging results felt none at all. One large study of over 3,000 people found that spine changes seen on MRIs are usually a normal part of aging and don’t necessarily cause pain. His work with his patients demonstrated that emotional stress and repressed anger can create very real physical pain. He helped many thousands of people recover from chronic pain with his medical practice and his books. I was one of them. 

It’s important to note that pain or other symptoms are not “all in your head.” Chronic symptoms are  absolutely real. But all our experiences are mediated by the brain, and our brains interpret pain based on not only sensations sent from the body, but also based on expectation, and the perception of danger. If we’re afraid that something is wrong with our bodies, or of conflict, negative emotions, or anything else we experience, pain and other symptoms can begin or intensify. On the other hand, if we feel safe and confident in our body’s strength, and in our ability to handle our emotions and our relationships, they can fade—even when nothing physical has changed. This is why treatments that reduce fear and increase a sense of safety can be so effective. The fact that changes in in how we interpret the world impact our symptoms is why we call these symptoms “neuroplastic.”

Over the past several years, there has been increasing evidence supporting Dr. Sarno’s theory, and new treatments have begun to be proven to help patients overcome neuroplastic symptoms. In 2020, I completed training with the Pain Psychology Center to work with clients using Pain Reprocessing Therapy (PRT). A study at the University of Colorado found that people with long-term back pain experienced major or complete recovery after just four weeks of PRT.

PRT helps retrain the brain to interpret pain signals differently. It uses mindfulness, cognitive, and behavioral techniques to reduce fear, calm the nervous system, and build a sense of safety in the body. As fear decreases, pain often does too—sometimes permanently.

Chronic symptoms, as miserable as they can be, often serve hidden purposes. They may give us permission to slow down, rest, or seek care from others. They may distract us from emotions we’d rather not face. Understanding these patterns can help us reclaim our energy and our lives.

When we start to truly trust that our bodies are strong and resilient, and that we can handle our emotions and the stresses in our lives, we can stop letting pain dictate our choices. With the right tools and mindset, recovery is possible—and life can feel full and joyful again.

 

Take a test to see if your chronic pain or symptoms are likely treatable using a mind-body approach

References:

  1. Sarno, M.D., John E. Healing Back Pain: The Mind-Body Connection. New York, NY: Warner Books, 1991.
  2. Sarno, M.D., John E. The Mindbody Prescription: Healing the Body, Healing the Pain. New York, NY: Warner Books, 1998.
  3. AJNR Am J Neuroradiol. 2015 Apr; 36(4): 811–816.

    Published online 2014 Nov 27. doi: 10.3174/ajnr.A4173

 

Coping with Anxiety Using Mindfulness

anxietyYou know the feeling when it starts: an unpleasant burning in your chest or abdomen, a feeling of cold on the back of your neck, tingling in your arms, or tightness in the back of your throat. Anxiety is a physical phenomenon.

Many of us are unaware of the specific physical sensations associated with our anxiety, but it sends a signal to our brain that we are in danger. On its own, anxiety tends to pass quickly and without much ado. It is the way we attribute meaning to the sensations in our body that causes anxiety to feel unbearable and to stick around. We interpret our anxiety as being “out of control.” We look to our environment for signals that we really are in danger, either physically or emotionally. And we beat ourselves up for feeling anxious, telling ourselves “What is wrong with me?” “Why can’t I feel calm?” And even worse, “I can’t tolerate feeling this way.”

But in reality, we can tolerate anxiety. By tolerating it and observing, without fear, its physical manifestations, we rob it of its power over us. And over time, anxiety will diminish if we refuse to escalate it by letting it take over our thoughts.

Mindfulness is one of the most powerful tools for coping with and transforming anxiety. While it may feel like WE ARE anxious, bringing awareness to our body and choosing to focus on the specific physical sensations we are experiencing allows us to see that we are the observer of anxiety, not its victim. We can choose to halt self-defeating thoughts by returning awareness to our body and reminding ourselves “Anxiety cannot hurt me. It is only a feeling, and it is temporary. I am in control of myself. I can choose to be aware of the anxiety without letting it take over my thoughts.”

Practice doing mindfulness exercises such as this one when you are not feeling particularly anxious, as a way of being ready for anxiety when it comes. Learning to focus your full attention on your body rather than your thoughts takes some practice, but only five minutes a day can make a huge difference in reducing anxiety and helping you cope with it when it comes.

Anxiety is often associated with depression, even if the depression is not severe. Taking steps to address negative patterns of thinking, grieving losses, and learning to take better care of ourselves physically and emotionally is another important step in dealing with anxiety. If you need help to learn to identify and challenge negative thoughts, work through with past trauma or loss, or learn to improve your self-care and relationships, finding a therapist you trust is a great place to start.

Need Support? PSI is there to help!

Postpartum Support International is now offering even more online support meetings for pregnant and postpartum moms isolated at home. Check out the link below to find out more or to sign up.

https://www.postpartum.net/get-help/psi-online-support-meetings/

Take a test to see if you have Prenatal or Postpartum Depression

Postpartum Depression

Risk Factors, Symptoms, and What To Do

Take a Screening Test for PPD

The Baby Blues has become as much an accepted part of being a new mother as engorged breasts and sleep deprivation. But what if the Blues don’t go away? For 10-20% of new mothers, Postpartum Depression (PPD) is an unwanted and difficult part of the first year of motherhood. The causes of PPD are many, and can include hormonal and lifestyle changes, a lack of social support, sleep deprivation, a high-risk pregnancy, a traumatic birth or difficult recovery, or breastfeeding problems. You are also at a higher risk of PPD if you have suffered previously from depression, or have recent losses or trauma in your life. Symptoms of PPD and related disorders can include:

  • Feeling sad, depressed, numb, or crying a lot
  • Restlessness or irritability
  • Unusually strong feelings of anger or resentment
  • Lack of energy
  • Having headaches, chest pains, heart palpitations, numbness, tingling, dizziness or nausea, hyperventilation or other unexplained physical symptoms
  • Difficulty sleeping or excessive tiredness
  • Loss of appetite or conversely, overeating and weight gain
  • Difficulty concentrating, remembering, and making decisions, or confusion
  • Excessive worry about the baby or lack of interest in the baby
  • Feelings of guilt and worthlessness
  • Lack of interest or pleasure in activities
  • Obsessive thoughts or compulsive behaviors
  • Fear of hurting the baby or yourself

Many mothers experience only a few of these symptoms, but if you feel like something is wrong and you’re not quite yourself, that is an important signal. If these symptoms persist for two weeks or more, the mother should promptly get support by talking to her doctor or a mental health professional. PPD is a highly treatable condition, with therapy, medication, or a combination of the two.

If you need medication and you are told that you must give up breastfeeding, make sure you get the advice of a psychiatrist who is knowledgeable about medications for breastfeeding mothers. There are a few antidepressants which are routinely prescribed for breastfeeding mothers with untraceable amounts detectable in the baby’s bloodstream. Moreover, breastfeeding can be beneficial both for the depressed mother, the long-term health of her baby, and bonding, which is even more challenging when a mother is depressed.

Depression not only affects you: it affects your relationships with your partner and your baby. Untreated, depression can lead to bonding difficulties and delayed development or failure to thrive. Getting the help you need to recover quickly is the best thing you can do for your baby and yourself.

Most importantly, tell your support people (your family, friends, partner) how you are feeling. The burden of trying to seem happy and “keeping it all together” can make the depression worse. You need to lean on the people who care about you, get as much help as you need until you’re back to feeling like yourself, and don’t beat yourself up for having PPD. It is NOT YOUR FAULT.

Commitment and Kids

Why the Couple Relationship Is So Important When You Are Parents

baby shoes

What makes a committed relationship thrive once kids come into the picture? It’s the ability to stay connected—to feel loved, supported, and safe with each other—even through the chaos of raising children. Maintaining that bond helps couples weather the storms of parenting with their relationship (and sanity) intact.

Why Your Relationship Still Matters

After having children, it’s easy for your partnership to slip to the bottom of the list. Work demands attention, the baby needs constant care, and “couple time” can feel like a luxury. But when your relationship is consistently last, even a strong partnership can begin to suffer.

Taking care of your connection isn’t selfish—it’s essential. A loving relationship forms the foundation for your family’s stability and your children’s emotional well-being. Kids thrive when they see their parents treating each other with kindness, respect, and affection.

Nurturing Connection

Keeping your relationship healthy doesn’t mean grand gestures—it means small, intentional efforts to stay close.

  • Spend time together, even briefly, without the kids.
  • Find joy in shared activities as a family.
  • Keep physical affection and intimacy alive in whatever way works for both of you.
  • Accept that your partner, like you, is a human being doing their best—and not a perfect parent.

Studies consistently show that children do best when their parents’ relationship is strong, even when parenting isn’t flawless.

Communicate with Care

Good communication is at the heart of every healthy relationship. It may seem easier to avoid conflict or bury frustration, but unspoken resentment can quietly erode intimacy and affection. Learning how to talk about your feelings calmly and honestly can bring you closer, even when conversations are uncomfortable.

Here’s an example:
Imagine your partner is caring for the baby but spends part of that time watching football on TV. You feel frustrated—it’s understandable. Rather than snapping in the heat of the moment or bottling up your feelings, take a breath and reflect on what you want to say.

You might start with something like:

“I know you’ve had a long day and need to unwind. I appreciate that you’re spending time with the baby, but I feel a bit resentful when I see the TV on after I’ve been with her all day. Can we talk about it?”

This approach invites conversation rather than conflict. Your partner may open up about feeling uncertain or inexperienced with the baby. You may realize that your child won’t be harmed by a little football, and that both of you are simply trying to do your best. Working through the issue helps resentment fade and understanding grow.

Knowing When to Let Go

Not every irritation needs to be discussed—but ask yourself, can I truly let this go? If not, it’s better to talk about it calmly before frustration builds. Conflict handled with care can deepen intimacy and trust.

Getting Support When You Need It

Every couple faces challenges. If you find that your conversations aren’t leading to resolution or connection, consider seeking help from a couples therapist. Having a supportive space to talk can help you rebuild goodwill and rediscover the warmth that brought you together in the first place.

Often, the recurring issues between partners stem from deeper worries—about feeling loved, valued, or secure. Reconnecting on that emotional level can make small conflicts feel manageable again and remind you that you’re on the same team.

A strong relationship isn’t about avoiding conflict—it’s about staying connected through it. When you nurture your partnership, you not only strengthen your bond but also create a more loving, stable home for your children and yourselves.