Category Archives: Chronic Pain

When the Doctor Says Everything Looks Fine (And You Still Hurt)

Medical rule-outs and mind-body rule-ins for those with chronic pain or symptoms

When I was suffering the worst chronic symptoms of my life, I saw all the doctors, did all the tests, and never got any answers that helped me, just one that scared me so much that it made everything worse.

The problem is, the medical system’s approach to many chronic symptoms is all wrong. It assumes that the “problem” occurs solely in the body, overemphasizes common imaging findings that don’t necessarily explain symptoms, and treats patients as if their nervous systems are irrelevant and as if doctors’ words don’t cause harm.

For many people with chronic symptoms, healing requires not just a different diagnosis but a fundamentally different style of relating to patients.

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What Chronic Pain Might Be Telling Parents of Challenging Kids

On suppressed emotions, neuroplastic symptoms, and why self-compassion might be the most therapeutic thing you can do

There’s a version of parenting I imagined before I had children. It involved connection, warmth, small hands in mine. It did not involve sitting in a school parking lot after a parent teacher conference, trying to remember how to breathe.

I have an adult son who is neurodivergent. He is brilliant, funny, kind, and, for many years, genuinely difficult. Hard at school, where the structure and overstimulation chafed him in ways nobody quite had words for. Hard with his siblings, where his temperament caused more conflict and chaos than would have been ideal. Hard for me to reach on the days when I was already running on fumes, and the gap between the parent I wanted to be and the one I actually was felt like a canyon.

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Your Nervous System Doesn’t Need You to Be Calm

That’s a good thing, because stress is a big part of a life with purpose and meaning

I remember a time in my life when stress was overwhelming and I was drowning. My severe anxiety, depression and physical symptoms landed me in a psychiatric hospital when I was postpartum with my second child. I had never experienced stress like that before, or since.

In the hospital, we had group sessions where we did relaxation exercises. Trying to relax was the absolute worst thing for my anxiety. I thought I was going to crawl out of my skin. Trying to calm my nervous system actually made me even more anxious.

The crazy thing was, seven months later I started a business.

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What the Research Finally Proves About Chronic Pain

Science has finally caught up to what thousands already knew

I promised in my post a couple of weeks ago to share the scientific evidence supporting Pain Reprocessing Therapy (PRT), but then I got inspired to write about nocebos instead. Sorry about that! This week’s post is for you science-oriented skeptics out there.

Before There Was Evidence, There Was Sarno

Those of you coming to this work right now are lucky. There is more evidence than ever before to support neuroplastic recovery. When Dr. John Sarno was writing about mind-body recovery in the 1980s and 90s, he was widely ridiculed and his theories were rejected by his medical peers, even as thousands of patients recovered from their symptoms using his methods.

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Pain as a Self-Fulfilling Prophesy

When symptoms have become a conditioned response, and how you can untrain your brain

I used to believe that typing was bad for my wrists. And I lived with chronic wrist pain that prevented me from typing, gardening, carrying my children, and on bad days even opening jars or doors. Here’s how that kind of pain works — and how it can change.

Here’s how a conditioned response works:

You notice a twinge in your lower back. In the fraction of a second before you’ve even consciously registered it, your nervous system is already sounding the alarm. Oh, no! I’ve got a day at home with my sick toddler, they’re going to want to be carried around all day â€“ this is one I hear frequently from my clients with back pain. Thus starts a rotten day stuck at home, where by the evening you’ll be in agony. That’s essentially how pain operates when it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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You Can Unlearn Your Pain

What neuroscience is teaching us about chronic pain — and the treatment that’s changing lives.

Many years ago, I went through a two-year period with chronic tendinitis in my wrists. During those years there were countless days when I couldn’t type, garden, cook, or even open doors or jars without excruciating pain. I saw my doctor and went to physical therapy for over a year. I stretched, I rested, I iced, I splinted. Nothing really shifted.

I overcame my wrist symptoms after reading a book called Healing Back Pain by Dr. John Sarno, which convinced me that my wrists weren’t damaged. At the time, that was enough — the pain gradually faded and I moved on.

It wasn’t until I got trained in Pain Reprocessing Therapy (PRT) in 2021 that I looked back and understood the fuller picture.

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The Need Nobody Talks About in Chronic Pain Recovery

If you’ve struggled with chronic pain or symptoms, there may be a deeper need beneath the surface—one that, when finally met, may be the missing piece in your recovery

I have been working with a client recently who recovered remarkably quickly from disabling pain and other symptoms. She hadn’t been able to work or care for herself for quite a while. She had moved home with a parent and needed help with even small tasks, such as taking a shower, pouring herself a glass of water, or opening doors. She was unable to use her phone because of debilitating pain in her hands.

She was highly motivated to heal, as you can imagine.

She is now living independently, driving herself to work, doing a job that involves lots of work on a laptop, and using her phone too much (like the rest of us!)

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How I Learned Not To Abandon Myself

(and What a Mispronounced Name Taught Me)

My body had been speaking what I refused to acknowledge: I was abandoning myself to take care of everyone else, and my nervous system wasn’t having it anymore.

While postpartum with my second child, I was hospitalized for severe depression and anxiety after suffering months of chronic dizziness and nausea. I was released from the hospital after twelve days of inpatient treatment. During those days, I kept solid food down for the first time in months, started to have an appetite, and was just beginning to be able to sleep through the night. I was seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

When I got home and was back in the stressful environment I had left, I immediately felt like no recovery had occurred at all. My husband expected me to be back to 100% right away, and every stressful moment, even the sound of my son’s voice (needing something from me!), caused a wave of dread, dizziness and nausea to come right back. Clearly, I hadn’t fully recovered yet. So I got put in a full-day intensive outpatient program for six weeks, so I could ease back into “life on the outside.”

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Handouts for Recovery from Anxiety, Pain or Symptoms

I’m sharing some handouts that I created for my Substack newsletter, Body Wise Parent. I hope you find them helpful!

Neuroplastic Pain & Symptoms Overview

A general overview of neuroplastic pain & symptoms, for those suffering from chronic pain or persistent physical symptoms and clinicians new to this field.

Somatic Tracking for Chronic Pain/Symptoms

A mindfulness exercise associated with Pain Reprocessing Therapy, for people overcoming chronic pain or symptoms.

Inner Child/Inner Parent Dialogue Exercise

For people who are learning to improve emotional self-care and overcoming the impact of childhood emotional neglect.

Overcoming Compulsive Caretaking Handout

For people who feel over-responsible for others and are learning not to abandon themselves.

Emotional Awareness & Expression Handout for Anxiety and Pain or Symptoms

For people learning to acknowledge, allow and express emotions as a way of calming their nervous system and diminishing chronic pain or other symptoms.

The Good Enough Parent

For those of you learning to overcoming perfectionism in your parenting, so you can be a “good enough parent,” and give your children the benefits of experiencing frustration, advocating for themselves, and can develop a greater sense of their own capabilities.

Breaking Free from Perpetual Problem-Solving

For those of you learning to overcoming the habit of “problem-solving mode,” to learn to tolerate uncomfortable physical sensations and difficult emotions and teach your brain that you are safe, to calm your nervous system and overcome anxiety, chronic pain and neuroplastic symptoms.

Safety Reappraisal for Chronic Pain/Symptoms

For people overcoming chronic pain or symptoms by establishing a greater sense of safety in the body.

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When My Body Expressed What I Couldn’t Say

How stress manifested as severe physical symptoms

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